Observing life
by Ruthiexx
Summary: Things have changed over the years. Finding Better than life and finding out there isnt anything better then the life they were leading except maybe where their lives are heading.


Author: Ruthie/Miac

Title: Observing Life

E-Mail:

Pairing(s): Lister/Rimmer, slight Lister/Kochanski

Rating: PG

Warnings: None

Disclaimer: If I owned Red Dwarf… I'd probably have a heart attack. I'm still here so I don't own any of it, apart from DVD's, Videos, one book, three BTL fan magazines….

Season/Episode Related: See below. Set after Legion in the Series 6 timeline.

Authors Notes: The TIVG Better than life was stolen from the episode of the same title, the clapping to get out of the game came from Gunmen of the Apocalypse and the masks and strapping into the seats came from the Beyond a Joke and Blue. I've meshed them together a bit as they were all TIV consoles as it where.

"Please give me feedback, although I'm not going to force you coz that's just rude. But think of how much happiness it will bring." (that was cheesy)

* * *

Rimmer and Lister had sought the ship for the total immersion video game they had received in the post pod a few years ago. "Better than life." It had been the ultimate game, bringing you all you wanted in life, building yourself a better life in a way.

Rimmer remembered how it had gone hideously wrong last time, being buried in sand, jam spread across his face with killer ants coming their way. His life had been a nightmare then as well, but he felt better about himself now. He was still insecure and stuffy but he had friends. He had a best friend, so he wasn't an officer that didn't matter anymore; he had something better than that. He had Lister.

Lister picked up the game and loaded it into the computer, they strapped themselves in and the masks came over their faces dragging them into unconsciousness.

"Welcome to the Total Immersion Video Game 'Better Than Life.'" The host told them as they walked into an old fashioned Ballroom. "Here you can enjoy yourself with anything you desire, just think of what you would like and watch it appear. If you want to get out of the game simply think of exiting or alternatively you can clap your hands like so." The host clapped his hands twice and disappeared.

"Just don't get us screwed this time okay?" "It wasn't my fault Listy, my mind turned against me, I promise to try to stop anything like that happening this time." Rimmer clasped his hands behind his back to stop him pushing Lister playfully. It was odd for Rimmer, these day's instead of not being able to touch he had to stop himself from touching. Rimmer wasn't the kind of person who joked around and playfully pushed a friend, not that he had experienced friendship.

Why was it everything that had happened to him after he had died had been good?

"We gonna split up?" Lister asked looking slightly worried at his roommate, he was unsure if this was the best thing to do, bringing Rimmer here, knowing his traitorous imagination they were bound to be tied up and ingested by some monster they had encountered before in Real Life.

"Alright then." Rimmer closed his eyes and tried to think of something pleasant, he opened his eyes to find himself standing aboard Red Dwarf. Rimmer thought to himself that this wasn't what he would have thought of as pleasant but as he moved down the corridor he realised that it was pleasant in its memories and its calm.

Even the humming of the engines seemed peaceful and serene to Rimmer and he smiled, it was nice to be back on the large red trashcan he had called home for 12 long years.

He strode down the corridors confidently remembering where every turn off went to ad where he was headed. The Observation Deck. Although first he wanted to stop off at his and Lister Quarters to see if anyone else was aboard the ship. Rimmer checked his watch, all the officers would be on duty now and those who weren't were probably doing recreational things like spending time with friends and loved ones, or sleeping until their next shift.

He didn't see or meet anyone along the corridors or even on the lift going up the two levels to where his sleeping quarters where. It didn't faze Rimmer as he basked in the silence. It was odd how a ship as small as the Starbug could make so much noise whereas a ship the size of city could be so quiet.

Eventually he arrived and the door whooshed open, he stepped into the bunkroom and looked around, Lister wasn't here and Rimmer's spirits dropped a little, he didn't want to be aboard a ship as big as the Dwarf on his own.

Touching items around the room, he thought of what Lister might be doing, No doubt with Kochanski. He thought bitterly. Rimmer shook his head, picking up a London Jets t-shirt of Lister's and he concentrated on the texture of the worn fabric. He could recall almost every time Lister had worn the shirt although he had not seen it in years, not since they had managed to loose the Dwarf.

Lifting the fabric to caress his cheek with it he also could smell Lister on it, the smell of a vindaloo, lager and the faint trace of cigarette smoke. He suddenly found himself standing next to the person in question still holding the shirt to his face.

"Uh, Rimmer what are ya doin'?" Rimmer stood rigid, his hands clenching the shirt, which he wrenched from his face. "Nothing Listy, just remembering some things."

Lister left the subject and didn't ask where and why Rimmer was snuggling his t-shirt, he had caught the London Jets Logo on the front and knew he was the only one who had a curry stain across it. He was a little pre-occupied by the fact that what he had just witnessed had touched him.

He had thought hard of what would be better then life about Starbug and could only come up with the time he had spent with his grandmother in Liverpool, but too many bad memories assaulted him, the stupid and irresponsible things he had done just to bum around.

Lister had just sat down at the table to the side of the ballroom and wished for a bottle of whiskey. He had summed up the courage and thought of Kochanski, not one that would fall all over him, the real her, just to see how he would be around her if he ever did see her again.

Kochanski had arrived in a flash and Lister drained the end of his glass, getting up he asked her what he had always fumbled around over. "Could we ever be together?" She smiled at him, but he couldn't smile back, he knew the answer already. He would never see her again; he was the last human being alive. "Goodbye Kris." He told her kissing her cheek and she disappeared. He slumped back into his chair and poured himself another glass. He wished Rimmer were there.

Rimmer spotted the whiskey and sat down, "What happened?" he asked pouring himself a glass of the amber liquid. Lister needed to talk; he could see it in his face. "I finally found out whether me and Kris would ever make it." He sighed looking Rimmer in the eyes, "I saw her and I just knew we could never be, she's dead I have to accept that, but when I looked at her smile I didn't feel in love with her anymore, like I've already mourned for her and I've moved on. I thought I loved her Rimmer, I really did."

Rimmer didn't say anything; he knew it would be useless trying to sound sympathetic, it wasn't what was needed right now. He re-filled Lister glass and brushed the back of his hand with his fingertips and patted it gently. It wasn't the easiest of things, touching someone, Rimmer just didn't know how to handle these things but he knew Lister needed the comfort.

Maybe it wasn't the best thing to do right now but Rimmer wished them to the observation tower. He found himself with his arms around Lister a second later and he pulled away. "Sorry." He muttered looking down and then out towards the stars. A moment later and he was back with his arms around Lister. "I'm sorry Listy." He whispered over and over, squeezing his eyes shut tightly. It turned out that Lister had in fact pulled him back for the embrace and was hanging onto Rimmer just as tightly.

"I knew I didn't love her anymore man, and when I saw you with my t-shirt I realised why." Rimmer flinched slightly realising that Lister had caught him red-handed.

"Why?" he whispered gently loosening his hold and pulling back a little to look at Lister in the eyes, he had beautiful deep brown eyes and he was smiling lighting them up. "Coz I love you smeghead." Rimmer cast his eyes downward again and Lister was terrified that Rimmer would not be able to face him again. Rimmer looked up and bent his head forward capturing that smile with his lips. Lister closed his eyes, and wished them out of the game.

Un-strapping themselves as quickly as they could, they kept glancing at each other as they walked down the corridor to their bunk on Starbug. "I love you too Listy." Rimmer told him and pulled him inside the door, which whooshed shut behind them. Lister chuckled as he was pulled into Rimmer's arms; he lent up and kissed Rimmer passionately.

There wasn't anything better than life.


End file.
